Meditation

 

I am meditating 

I am thinking 

I am thinking that I am thinking 

I must try and concentrate 

I must be aware that I am concentrating 

Too much “I”, how about non-self?

Must not try too hard to stop my mind wandering

Try and observe myself as an outsider

my foot is itching

my nose is itching

Did I switch off the gas cooker

must load the dishwasher

I must attend to that noise in the car

Is that the neighbour’s dog barking

We used to have a dog

I prefer dogs to cats

My back is hurting

Must focus my attention on my back

I shouldn’t have been rude over the phone

He did ask for it!

But being kind is better

So many nuisance calls

What am I doing next week

Will it hurt when I visit the dentist

He is a nice man

Lovely receptionist

Must write that letter

Look at the emails first

So much spam mails these days

Am I spending too much time on the Net

Another week has gone

Stop!

think of the present moment

observe the present moment

How much longer will I live

Must not waste that time

Use the present moment

Past is gone, future yet to come

Wonder what’s on Telly

Is Tiger Woods playing

Looks like he is making a comeback

My swing needs attention

Hope I can play next week

It is very cold and frosty

Stop!

There we go again!

Back to meditation

I am aware and focused

It is so hard to keep the mind still

Flitting butterflies

Changing clouds

Changing moods

My knee is hurting 

Must straighten my leg

Will I ever succeed in meditation

What is the real reason why I want to meditate

Let it go says Ajahn Brahm

I like his talks

May be I should go to Perth to meet him

The live broadcasts from Perth are very good

My hips are hurting

Will my joints get worse

Will I lose my independence

Am I a Buddhist because I was born one

Jesus must have been a very good person

I am feeling hungry

Must not eat too many crisps

I feel like drinking some fruit juice

must eat  more vegetables

write a reminder for repeat prescription

Good thing I am retired

Wonder how my friends are

Stop!

back to meditation

This is not easy!

must be aware that I am meditating

must not try too hard

I am thinking

I am thinking  that I am thinking

I am aware that I am thinking that I am thinking

 

 

Poem by Mahendra Gonsalkorale.

This was a poem that was sent to me by my Dad’s university buddy whom I call “Uncle Mahenra”. Uncle Mahendra sent this poem to me recently in repsonse to one of my poems and I really liked it. For one, it really captures the essessnce of the struggle one encounters with sitting meditation, and I think his candid and honest description really opens the doors of “inclusivity” to those who have never tried to meditate before as well as those who have tried but finish a sitting feeling like they have failed dismally. I wrote back to Mahendra and said something to the effect as “to sit is enough” and I think it really is! I’ve been meditating for years and I frequently feel this way – but I guess the main thing that “experience” gives me (sometimes) is the wisdom to know that it’s okay if the mind wanders when one is meditating, and it is good if one is aware of this wandering – which the writer of the poem clearly is, albeit after the fact. 

So well done for your sitting Uncle Mahendra and thanks for sharing your insights with us!

The second reason I particularly like this poem is that there is reference to Ajahn Brahm who is an inspirational Buddhist Monk who lives in Perth and quite an amazing meditation instructor. I was fortunate enought to meet him last year on my birthday (when I was working a locum in Rockingham) and we had quite an interesting chat which I wanted to write a blog article on. I never got around to it but hopefully one day soon, during one of my study breaks, I will write this, as he offered me some great insights about the use of love in practicing medicine, which I would love to share!